First Day of School

Wow! I just dropped my baby off for her first day of kindergarten. Don't get me wrong...I'm not sad. I did have a few moments when we first got to the school where my eyes were a little teary just because they're growing up so fast. The thought did cross my mind that the short period where they want to spend time with mommy and daddy will end before I know it. Overall, I think I have this overwhelming feeling of happiness. For one thing, her and bubby had used up all their patience for each other over the summer and were driving one another crazy. Second, I have about six hours to myself today. What will I do with the time?

Loneliness

Loneliness

A complete emptiness in your life

A void that seems unfillable

Groping in the darkness for something you know is there

but cannot be found

Silent pictures passing before your mind

with no words to express their meaning

Infinite wishes that can never be granted

Eyes forever looking upon an image that isn't there

Voicing your feelings aloud

with no one there to listen

Walking towards a light that dims when you get near it

A form of destruction surrounding you from all angles

and every direction

I found my poetry book from high school the other day. I actually wrote this in February 1992...can't help but wonder what was going on in my life at that time. Of course, it made me stop and ponder where I am currently as well. As wives...as mothers...as sisters...as daughters...we are pulled in so many directions. Sometimes I feel like I'm play acting and going through the motions. Sometimes I don't think I'm doing a very good job.

When I get in these introspective moods I can really feel so sorry for myself. But I know that I can look around me and see that my life isn't too bad. My hubby always says "Thank God for my problems" and he is so right. I don't have to look far to see that I'm truly blessed.

I just finished reading The Shack. "Papa" or God talked about how we are so busy worrying about the past and everything that we have done wrong, or just too afraid of the future, that we forget to be happy in the now. One of Eleanor Roosevelt's famous quotes-- "Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That's why we call it 'The Present'." What a smart lady!

Life

Life just keeps going, going, going...sometimes I wish I could push the PAUSE button...

It's the weekend

It's the weekend!

Hubby is home, kids start school next week, little sis is here with us...and there's so much to do!
The house is a mess (I never did get around to cleaning it last week) and I think about all that I should do. Clean bathrooms, mop floors, vacuum, clean out the garage, go through the storage building and get rid of stuff, and then I think. It's the weekend. I have two days off and then I work a 12-hour shift on Monday. Life is short...have fun...there's always cleaning tomorrow, or Tuesday, or Wednesday, after the kids are at school. I read about some of these super moms on here and I'm amazed. I want to be like them! But I'm me...I like to procrastinate. I probably won't clean today...or tomorrow...hopefully, hopefully, it'll get done next week. I'll keep you posted.

Kill them with kindness

I try to make my workplace as pleasant as possible. I smile at people, ask how there day is going, help others when I can, and try to be encouraging to my co-workers. Why is it that some people (women in particular) "eat their young". I've seen it happen over and over...new employee enters the unit, workplace, etc. Older employee tries to make life as difficult as possible for that new person. Is it some sort of ritual? Is it some sort of hazing? Does it make them feel superior? Life is hard enough at times. A new job is considered one of the top stressors that a person can have. It's unfortunate that there are so many negative people in this world. Thank goodness that there are plenty of pleasant, optimistic, half glass full kind of folks as well! As for the rest of them...my mom always said "Kill them with kindness".

Joy & Cindy

My daughter, Joy and my little sis, Cindy. They are both such little stinkers--as this pictures demonstrates!

Fed through mommy's belly button...

My kids love to get their scrapbooks out. Joy said to me multiple times today "Mommy, I want to look at pictures of when I was a baby." Here's a picture of them looking at Jared's book. As I was fixing dinner I heard Jared tell Joy that "Look Joy, this is a picture of right after I was born...you know, we were fed through mommy's belly button." Kids are so funny! I've told him several times that he was fed through his belly button by a special food bag...that must be hard to remember!